Monday, March 27, 2006

Let Me Kisss You

Wow. So its been sometime since I’ve posted something other than “hi I am fine but busy” hasn’t it? I honestly wish I had more time than I do to chat to you, and leave you all messages, unfortunately, I really am very busy. But I miss you all.

Today, I am curious, if you will enlighten me. When is it appropriate to ask someone you don’t know out? Are there rules? Is there a set protocol?

I ask because I was asked to dinner by a guest at my restaurant today. I had never met him before. I gave him the exact same service that I give all my other customers, and yet something I must have done gave him the idea to ask me out. Was it my looks? Was it because I smile [and most waitresses don’t]? Was it because I was younger than he was, and he liked that? [not that it matters, because it doesn’t...I’d figure him around 56-58 though, he ordered off the senior menu]

I have no idea, still, he asked me out and I was completely flabergasted. I have never entertained the thought of asking out someone who has waited on me. I have never asked someone out if I didn’t know them relatively well. I’ve never even really gotten a date from a bar. [the few interludes I have had stemming from adult venues were with people I had known for at least some time]

It has me interested. Tell me, dear friends, what you think. I am a little more than a bit surprised. Maybe I shouldn’t be. I’m not a prude, you know this better than most I imagine, still, I can’t fathom asking *a total stranger* to dinner. Let alone expecting them to anser yes.

I’m stumped. Is it stupid of me to even think it odd? You tell me.


swisslet said...

it's not odd as much as creepy. What do you think a 50-odd year old guy is hoping to get by asking out a lovely 20-something year old waitress?

I suppose it can't hurt to ask, right?

He's the one to ask, but I imagine they're all thinking it !



adem said...

Young 'uns are always going clubbing and picking up complete strangers, but this is normally just a one night stand. It's less unheard of to actually arrange to meet up at a later date with a stranger...and not usually with that age range,in which case I have to agree with ST that it woud be deemed slightly creepy.

Last year I was waiting a table in the restaurant section at the pub and caught the eye of a girl celebrating her 19th Birthday with friends and family. She came up after the meal and asked if I wanted to go out sometime, and I thought she was quite pretty, didn't seem that mad, and thought I had nothing to lose. We met up a few times over the next month, had a fair bit in common, but there wasn't that spark.

I guess that's the problem of potentially involving yourself with a complete stranger, with whom you have no real connection. Of course I'm sure there are a lot of people who met in these circumstances and are very happy together.

On another note...just thinking here...I reckon that this could be a good ploy to get the laydeez, as it throws you off balance and leaves you temporarily susceptible....hmmm.

Flash said...

I don't think it's unusual as such.
I suppose when you get to that age the idiom Nothing ventured, nothing gained, must really ring true.

Can't knock the saucy old bugger, I'm sure I'd be asking too.

Mark said...

you didn't say yes, did you? it depends on how old and stuff he is as well.

The Dog of Freetown said...

I find it is most appropiate to ask when thirty times over the recommended level of alcohol consumption.

I think for men there's always an element of gambling involved.
If the prize is that tempting, they'll take any chance.

Aravis said...

I'm with Flash. I don't find it all that unusual really. Another possibility is that he's recently divorced or widowered and has no idea how to meet people anymore. It happens a lot. People suddenly find themselves alone after years of being with someone and they don't know how to go about dating now. It can be a scary time for them.

I'd say as long as he doesn't start pestering you, there's nothing to worry about. You're a beautiful young woman and he'd be crazy not to notice you. :0) On the other hand if he does become persistent, that I would find creepy. :0P

Erika said...

One of my good friends in life started out as my bank teller, who spontaneously asked me out on a date one day because he liked my smile. I was single, he was cute, so we tried dating but it failed on a romantic level. I'm awfully glad he had the guts to ask out a complete stranger, though, because he's a lovely friend.

I think more people don't because the risk of rejection is through the roof.

HistoryGeek said...

I actually don't think it's that odd, either.

Aravis' bank teller story reminds me that a former roommate met her husband through a complete stranger. The teller who was opening her bank account thought that my friend and her cousin would hit it off. She gave my friend's number to her cousin (with my friend's permission, of course). They are married and have 3 children now.

Anonymous said...

It's not odd at all, especially in light of your picture.. Alecya G, would you go out with me. Please, Pretty Please. Oh well, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Also ask yourself the question, "Why wouldn't he want to go out with you?"

Alecya G said...

of course I said no, I'm not single, Mark. *laughs* Anon...I'm afraid I don't even know you're name sir!

As for all of you who think I'm cute...go on...[no really] you'll make me blush.


Alecya G said...

Adem, I dont think its a good ploy..honestly...I think it shocks me to where I say no before thinking about it. Of course, I will say no anyway, since I am not I'm wrong.

Incedentally, it happened again today, a different guy tried to set me up with his lunch partner, and the poor guy, I dont know if he was horrified his friend made the attempt or he thought I was horrifyinh, but he had a priceless look on his face. He looked releived when I declined, and said I was sure he had ladies throwing themselves at him anyway [he was quite good looking]

Ah, well